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dribdrabble original - the art of drabbling, <500 words at a time
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Because Ciri Is Not A Coward 
27th-Feb-2009 11:46 am
[music] last significant
Title: The Difference
Author: C
Rating: PG13 for angry Ciri, mild violence, implied greater violence and a necromancer.
Summary: Ciri may be scared of everything, but she isn't a coward.
Word Count: 448
Notes: Edited version. Full version will be found at my journal when I get a chance to post it. Written last night on the last leg of a flight to Florida. Ciri's accent gets a lot thicker when she's tired, doesn't it? For BTTIS.

"I don't understand," John Doe said, almost weakly. "I thought you were a coward."

Ciri bit her lip and looked at him. Her eyes hurt. She decided to relieve him of some ignorance; after all, he'd have plenty left. "They," she started. No, that wasn't what she wanted to say, was it? Oh, she was tired... "You knew I was scared. S'right? So you... assumed... I was a coward. Scared 'n coward aren't the same things."

Suddenly, she was angry. She wound her hand back and slapped him, very hard, hard enough -- Ciri blinked in mild astonishment -- to draw blood. He spat some of it out by her foot and just looked at her. She glared back, shaking.

"Do you have any idea," she near shouted, "any idea what it's like to live with the kind of fear I do? When even opening your eyes in the morning or leaving the room or, or talking to someone is fright'ning enough to make your heart stop? Do you?"

Doe stared at Ciri, partly because there wasn't really anything else to look at, partly because it had been a while since he had seen rage this incandescent.

"And you think me a coward because I live with that fear, fake a halfway normal existence despite that fear? Normal people... they're so stupid. They're oblivious, totally and utterly oblivious. They don't know enough to be afraid. I do. And I live anyway. That's not cowardice, not by a long shot. If bravery is doing what y'have to even if you're afraid, maybe I'm the bravest person in the world... or something," she added, winding down somewhat, suddenly herself and as quiet and unsure as ever. "I don't know. But tha's your answer."

She made for the door. His eyes followed her almost desperately; he didn't want to be left alone in the dark. The candle Ciri carried flickered and guttered, which alarmed him as much as the prospect of her leaving him alone with the Dreamspinners' nightmares.

"There's people an' want to talk t' you," Ciri said, for all the world as an unimportant afterthought. "Quite a lot. Maybe not jus' talk. They don' like necromancy here, I find. Um. Well. It was nice talking to you, I guess, except when it wasn't. Maybe. Er... I hope they don't. Um. Hurt you much. 'Cause whatever they do I'm pretty sure they're going to kill you."

She had reached the door by then, but couldn't stop herself from adding: "'s no less 'n you deserve. Maybe more. 'Bye, John Doe."

And life went on without him.
28th-Feb-2009 12:50 am (UTC)
This is great. I find the female character's speech patterns confusing, but that's just me. XD I even had a hard time reading Huckleberry Fin because of the accent. LOL, but I read written accents like a five-year-old. XDD

...Sorry. XD I'm rambling.

It's still very great, though. I more than liked it. XD The last line is brilliant.

28th-Feb-2009 03:15 am (UTC)
Thank you! I'm very glad you like it. (Looking back I can see I was typing fast, though. What ended up with an extraneous t... *fixes*)

Ciri's speech patterns are all but identical to mine, actually, and I get my accent from my parents (American-Minnesotan and American-New Orleans) and, oddly enough, from books; I pick up the style and accent that characters speak in. Hence, when I'm tired and my so-called accent is thick enough to cut with a knife, I sound in places rather like Lyra Silvertongue. I'm sorry if it made her speech hard to comprehend, though; I left out a lot of the accent notation basically because I figured it would interrupt narrative flow -- so at least it's easier than it could've been. :)

I'm really glad you like it. I like the last line too~

(The paragraph I took out to post it here was basically emphasizing how much his existence didn't matter to life re: it going on as normal. I might have to post it with that paragraph on my journal, I think it might've given the last line more weight, but maybe it got in the way. *ponders*)

However. For the third time, I thank you: for liking it and for making me terribly, terribly happy. Thank you so much. :)
28th-Feb-2009 10:03 pm (UTC)
No, no, no~ The accent is really great and it's nice to see it. I enjoy when they are written, I'm just slow and read them like a five-year-old. XD Seriously. I adore characters with accents. XD

<w< And I think you did post it in your journal, yes? XD -skips away to read- :D And you are very welcome.
28th-Feb-2009 02:39 pm (UTC)
The second last line reminds me of Pirates of the Caribbean, not really sure why.. just saying..

I liked how the reader (in this excerpt) is slowly introduced to the world, the whole thing about Dreamspinners' nightmares - AWESOME.

I also was a little thrown off by the accent but we're only reading an excerpt, I think it might be easier if it was part of a larger work and we had more time to get accustomed to it.

I'm totally into it.
28th-Feb-2009 03:11 pm (UTC)
I honestly don't know why it would remind you of Pirates of the Caribbean either; maybe I should rewatch the movies to figure it out...

Oh, thank you! This would actually be fairly near the middle or end of the book (depending on what you define as 'the book' and what you define as 'wait, who is this new character coming in two books late, why are all our canons fictional?') so I'm glad it wasn't confusing.

I'm sorry if the accent got in the way! I guess I didn't estimate that people might have trouble with it; there are friends of mine with characters who have much stronger accents, and I suppose I have trouble thinking that an accent which is basically mine could seem hard to comprehend. Thank you for your optimism though :)

Hooray! I'm glad you liked it, very very glad. So thank you again: because you liked it and because you made me very very happy. I think when I write more of this story I will post it here as well; so I hope you like those bits too.

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